This morning I awoke at my usual time— 4 a.m. Removing the covers and throwing my feet to floor I thought what am I doing jumping out of bed so early? Then I did something I never do… I got back in bed.
For the first time in (I don’t know how long) I laid quietly. This week has been an emotional week. My friend lost her brother, I’ve had some personal things I’ve had to deal with, and today I wondered why I’ve always been in such a hurry to wake up.
For the first 15 minutes I tried quieting my mind. When that didn’t work I tried quieting my breathing— but when I almost passed out from holding my breath— I realized there had to be something else I could do. So, I got up and decided I would do something different. I made my husband and I breakfast and the two of us chatted about how nice it was to have breakfast together. I then went outside and watched my four dogs play in the yard. They were excited… another day had arrived and they were barking to let me know that the sun was rising, and if I looked to the east I could see it too.
When the sun arrived I grabbed my coffee and came into my office. Sitting down at my computer I was reminded of yesterday, and all the other days before yesterday, and I seriously looked up to heaven and said, “God, you know my heart. No need to play the record over again. Can you just tell me what you want me to do?”
A moment later I turned on my radio and I had to smile as I “listened” to God answering my prayer.
What did I hear?
And the lyrics go like this…
Somethin’ from nothin’
One storm can come and blow it all away
Build it anyway
You can chase a dream
That seems so out of reach
And you know it might not ever come your way
Dream it anyway
God is great, but sometimes life ain’t good
When I pray it doesn’t always turn out like I think it should
But I do it anyway
I do it anyway
This world’s gone crazy and it’s hard to believe
That tomorrow will be better than today
Believe it anyway
For all the right reasons
And in a moment they can choose to walk away
love ’em anyway
You can pour your soul out singing
A song you believe in
That tomorrow they’ll forget you ever sang
Sing it anyway
I sing, I dream, I love
When the song played its last note I realized that God was sharing with me that I don’t completely understand why I get up at 4:00 a.m., or why I work all day at something that most will never understand. I also realized that I don’t have to understand all that God inspires my heart to do. All I have to know is… God is GREAT, and sometimes life ain’t good, and when I pray it doesn’t always turn out like I think it should, but DO IT ANYWAY!
And to confirm my heart I went to my Bible and read:
1 A good reputation is more valuable than the most expensive perfume. In the same way, the day you die is better than the day you are born. 2 It is better to spend time at funerals than at festivals. For you are going to die, and you should think about it while there is still time. 3 Sorrow is better than laughter, for sadness has a refining influence on us. 4 A wise person thinks much about death, while a fool thinks only about having a good time now. Ecclesiastes 7: 1-3
It’s funny because God is right. When family and friends gather at funerals they are there for each other. The focus has been removed from themselves, and they are there to remember someone they loved. When we attend festivals, we are there to enjoy ourselves. To get away from what we left behind… BUT funerals remind us that we don’t want to be left behind.
And, prayers are a funny thing. I just took a moment to listen and God whispered within my heart the answer to “why” I wake up at 4:00 a.m. each morning. There are moments within each day that I want to remember, and that’s when He wakes me up— so I can write them down!
ONWARD BY FAITH, ANYWAY!