There Are No Ya’buts…

Around 3:30 this morning I woke up  and decided I would turn the television on to see if  I could find something to watch. As I was turning through the channels I arrived at a show on Domestic Violence and decided to watch it. 

Recently I learned that Domestic Violence Awareness Month is in October, and evolved from the first Day of Unity observed in October, 1981 by the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence. The intent was to connect battered women advocates across the nation who were working to end violence against women and their children. The Day of Unity soon became a special week when a range of activities were conducted at the local, state, and national levels.

For 3 hours I watched as each show replicated women who were emotionally or physically abused. When the segments were over, all I could do was turn away from the television and cry. I cried for an hour, because I understand what it’s like to be born into an emotionally abusive household, and I understand what it’s like to marry an abuser.

What I loved about the show was that I was able to see abuse from the eyes of others.

And when one is born into abuse, I believe one marries it. It’s all we know! 

It’s not normal for a parent,  spouse,  friend, or even an acquaintance to have the right to emotionally or physically “beat” up on anyone. Each person arrives in the world with love and wonder, and it isn’t until someone else tries to knock it out of us do we lose the excitement for life.

Recently I’ve been surrounded by so many women who have been both: emotionally and physically abused, and the personalities are much the same. We each know that we were born to do something great and wonderful, but in the back of our minds we can’t seem to find the voice that tells us we can do it.

Those who have known me the longest always ask me this question, “Gina, with all that you’ve gone through, how were you able to turn out so well?”

It seems I’ve had years to think about that question and I have to say that I’m glad I got to experience life, and have learned to forgive. BUT… It was during those deep, dark, moments where I would open up my Bible and read. I do believe that God knows who we’re born to. Who we’re going to choose to marry. He knows that with the good of life comes the bad of life. He knows that evil prevails on earth, but peace prevails in heaven. I will never understand the insecurities of others who would ever want to emotionally or physically hurt anyone, but today… if  anyone reads this who is an abuser…


And, if anyone who reads this who is being abused, “STOP IT!”

Stop allowing another person to tell you you’re not beautiful. You’re not smart. You’re not worthy. You’re not ever going to amount to anything. BECAUSE YOU ARE! YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL! YOU ARE SMART! YOU ARE WORTHY, AND JESUS THOUGHT YOU WERE WORTH EVERYTHING BECAUSE HE DIED FOR YOU!

And if anyone is physically abusing you RUN OUT THE DOOR AND TO THE POLICE! Repeat after me… ‘IT’S NOT OKAY!”

And remember, THERE ARE NO YA’BUTS! Another person can’t justify evil, EVER!

There was a man who set out on a journey to lead others to the “promised” land. On his way he was summoned up to the mountain, and when he returned he was holding the Ten Commandments.  There’s not a day that goes by that I don’t remind myself of those Ten Commandments, and that is the reason that I didn’t stay at the place in which I came from.

God wants each person to climb that mountain, because the moment you do… that is where you will see the true example of love!

And God spoke all these words, saying: “I am the Lord your God, who brought you out of the land of Egypt, out of the house of bondage.

  1. You shall have no other gods before me.
  2. You shall not make for yourself any carved image, or any likeness of anything that is in heaven above, or that is in the earth beneath, or that is in the water under the earth; you shall not bow down to them nor serve them. For I, the Lord your God, am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers on the children to the third and fourth generations of those who hate me, but showing mercy to thousands, to those who love Me and keep My commandments.
  3. You shall not take the name of the Lord your God in vain, for the Lord will not hold him guiltless who takes His name in vain.
  4. Remember the Sabbath day, to keep it holy. Six days you shall labor and do all your work, but the seventh day is the Sabbath of the Lord your God. In it you shall do no work: you, nor your son, nor your daughter, nor your manservant, nor your maidservant, nor your cattle, nor your stranger who is within your gates. For in six days the Lord made the heavens and the earth, the sea, and all that is in them, and rested the seventh day. Therefore the Lord blessed the Sabbath day and hallowed it.
  5. Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long upon the land which the Lord your God is giving you.    
  6. You shall not murder.
  7. You shall not commit adultery.
  8. You shall not steal.
  9. You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor.
  10. You shall not covet your neighbor’s house; you shall not covet your neighbor’s wife, nor his manservant, nor his maidservant, nor his ox, nor his donkey, nor anything that is your neighbor’s.” Exodus 20: 1-17


And, if anyone wants to read the statistics on Domestic Violence I found this great article:

Onward by Faith!





Filed under Faith

2 responses to “There Are No Ya’buts…

  1. You’ve made some persuasive points in your article that are very thought-provoking. Your material is so persuasive that you have changed my mind on many points in your article. That’s how you know it’s good.

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